It happened when Drama was about four. I’d just sold to Harlequin and the title of my first book was His Virgin Acquisition. So that word was being thrown around indiscriminately. A lot. Because we just talking about books.
Then one day he was looking at a letter book with animals. And he comes to the V. V is for “V-V-V…Virgin!”
I remember calling my mom later and saying I’VE HARLEQUINNED MY CHILD!
The thing is, I’m destined to be a hideously embarrassing mother, no matter how you slice it. 1) I have an extremely cheesy sense of humor and am liable to burst into song with little to no notice. 2) Yeah, the sexy books.
Kids don’t like thinking of their parents as sexual beings. Or even people who know about sex. I remember this from when I was a kid. So once my kids figure out what I write I feel it’s going to be kind of a rude awakening. No, it’s not an autobiography but you know, it displays a bit of knowledge on the subject. Sex is not the be all and end all of my books, or indeed any romance novel, but if the media can’t separate the SEX from the book, I don’t expect kids to. (side note, I think the media is run by 13 year old boys, but that’s another post altogether)
Obviously I’ll be a source of embarrassment, but I think I would have been no matter what. And yes, there will be the occasional gaffe. Like my 4yo knowing having virgin be the representative word for the letter V. Or my 2yo carting my romance novels around like they’re a favorite doll. (she thinks they’re ‘pwetty’)
But there are other things I hope they get from this, my wonderful and unique career path.
I hope they learn that love is important. That glorifying love is nothing to be ashamed of.
I hope they learn they don’t have to apologize for what they read. For what they like.
I hope they learn that sex is beautiful (in the right context) and to be treasured, not giggled over, or played for laughs. (let’s face it, I’d rather have them learn about sex from a romance novel than from Jersey Shore.)
I hope they learn to follow their dreams, no matter how impossible they seem.
So for all the mistakes I make, I hope I can cancel some of them out.
And V is virgin. He wasn’t wrong. So…at least he knows the alphabet.
I love this, Maisey. And you’re so right, that was actually pretty clever of him to put two and two together to come up with virgin. Smart boy.
You know even before we had kids, The Professor and I used to plan ways we could embarrass our kids. Once they notice that kind of thing. I think it’s a parent’s prerogative and hey, at least you know they’re paying attention to you, listening in some regard.
I love your list of things they’ll learn from it. I’ve thought of that too. When I’m taking time to write instead of playing with my girls, I remind myself that them having a mom who has a passion, who has a talent that she uses for good (it’s my super power) that’s a good thing. I want them to go as high as they’re dreams will take them.
Robyn, Jane Porter told me that her son said once he learned from her to follow his dreams. I hope, so much, to pass that on to my children!
Maisey, you’re so funny. I laughed out loud at this. And I agree–I’d much rather my kids learn about sex from romance novels than from Snookie (who just had a really cute baby–did you see them on the cover of PEOPLE??).
It does get interesting later, when they really “get” what’s going on in the books…none of my teens have read mine. There *is* something odd about reading your mom’s sex scenes, LOL!!!
Hey, it’s all good. Better to be able to chuckle about sex and think it’s a natural thing than be all secretive about it–I grew up in a relaxed household–relaxed about everything but sex. You just didn’t talk about it. And that’s a shame. If my kids have to land on either far end of the spectrum, I’d rather they know too much than too little!!!!
:>)
Kieran, I so agree! Better they know too much, and from me, than half guessed at stuff from boys at school! (I did see Snookie’s baby. He is cute. I’d still rather she not give sex Ed to my kids.
) and lol…when my kids figure out what’s in my books I’ll come to you for advice!
Love it! So funny! Thank you!
xoxo
The Clarences
Thanks!
You’re welcome! How’s your week so far?
Hope all is well.
xoxo
The Clarences
http://www.theclarences.com
Lol. I’m the mom who, when I received my first copies of my debut, had SuperGirl sit down and “read” it so I could take pictures. And I like to think that I can’t be the only one who’s done that!! But, yes–to all the things you said above about what you want your kids to learn from your career. Of course, I’m waiting for the day when they start asking why they can read Daddy’s books but not Mama’s books yet. =)
Elise, the other day my oldest said: I just love the Hearry Potter books. And your books. (corruption complete!)
I plan on saying mommy’s books are boring!
My older kids lost all respect for me when I had my two youngest when they were in their teens. OMG I had sex twice when I was old and to make it worse I had visible proof so all their friends knew it too. (rolls eyes). Just recently my 28 year old read one of my stories. It was a teensy bit hot. She said she was shocked and she is the one living the bohemian lifestyle in Berlin. So there is no hope for me. On a brighter note. I’m glad I’m not the only person who breaks into song at the drop of a hat. But I’m not the only embarrassing presence in their lives. My mother handed out tracts to No. 2′s boyfriend and No.3 oldest son the other day on celibacy before marriage when she came for dinner.
Fiona, I am crying with laughter here! What more is there to say!?
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